Tag: Internet

An Aegis Against Online Negativity: Kyle Webster’s Proof Folder

opened folder for documents on table
Photo by Anete Lusina on Pexels.com

I’ve been playing around on the internet since about the mid-nineties, and I’ve noticed something: there is a lot of negativity on the web.

This was true in chat rooms, true on message boards and bulletin board services, quickly became true in the comments sections of blogs, and is now ubiquitious on social media. If you are on the web, you encounter negativity.

If you make stuff, whether it be photogaphy, video, digital artwork, music, articles, sermons, blog posts, academic lectures, poetry, logical arguments, jokes, lesson plans, or whatever, you’ll attract negative vibes. Some won’t like your work. Some won’t like that you are working. If it isn’t you they don’t like, you’ll be adjacent to someone enduring an onslaught of criticism. And it will make you wonder about your own work.

To lead, to make, to do, is to invite criticism.

When we are criticized, it hurts. Even when it comes from someone we don’t know.

Kyle Webster recently wrote about the negative reactions he received on social media after selling his collection of digital brushes to Adobe (the post includes a few graphic remarks). He asks, “Why do negative comments have so much power over us?”

He acknowledges they take hold of us. He offers a few reasons why they do so. Then, he offers one way to disarm those attacks and one way to prevent being overwhelmed by them. What does he propose?

Webster writes:

First and very importantly, you must know and accept this about the vast majority of comments you receive online about you or your work: the people writing them have never had the pleasure of getting to know the real you. They are not your family members or friends, or even acquaintances. To them, the entirety of your being is comprised of a brief bio with a profile picture — nothing more.

Are they insulting your character, your integrity, your true self? Of course not. They are literally attacking some pixels and a few words on a screen—not a human being. Not YOU.

Let this sink in and acknowledge it as an absolute truth.

Second, try this:

  1. Create a folder on your desktop, your tablet, or your phone that reads, “Proof.”
  2. Find any email, tweet, post, comment or message from somebody who has thanked you for something you have created or written something positive about you/ your work.
  3. Copy and paste these positive notes into your “Proof” folder.
  4. Read as many of them out loud as you can any time you are letting the trolls get to you.
  5. Repeat as necessary.

Even if you only have a handful of these friendly comments, remember that they are of huge importance because they are undeniable proof that your actions have had a positive impact on others.

I think that is helpful stuff. I also think we can apply this more broadly.

There isn’t only a lot of negativity on the web. There is negativity out there in the world. The internet just amplifies, concentrates, and directs it, making it possible for us to hear more voices than we used to, and much more quickly. People don’t just make negative remarks somewhere we might read them or hear about them, they can get directly in touch with us, and they don’t even need a phone book.

When the criticism isn’t coming from “out there,” there is the inner critic. I subject myself to self-criticism. And because of the internet, I have more examples I can compare myself to, people who I think speak better, write better, or lead better. The internet has probably trained my inner critic in more ways than I realize. I analyze ways I could have done or said things better. This can leave me feeling as though I’ve had more failures than successes. This can leave me feeling pretty discouraged.

As a Christian person, I’ve had to learn how to defend myself against these feelings theologically. In Romans 8, Paul writes eloquently about the sufferings we now face, the life with God those in Christ have now, and the hope of a coming, future glory. Every sentence in this majestic chapter is part of a larger argument. But Christians are reminded here that we have been given the gift of the Holy Spirit, that God sanctifies us through our trials, that we are held fast by the love of God, and that even if we are opposed and persecuted by people, even if we are killed, we have been embraced and accepted and approved of by God in Christ Jesus, who died for us and intercedes for us even now. Criticism is for a moment, but Christ is ours forever.

While this theological truth has bolstered me (and it has helped me quite a lot!), an “Encouraging” or “Happy” folder has helped as well. It gives me a collection of temporal things that I can pair with the eternal things, things I can see and touch and experience while I await that day when the unseen becomes sight. I can be thankful for the good things, even though they are passing. I can hope in the things that will last. I have a folder like this in my desk drawer at work. I keep scraps. Pictures. Positive notes. Reminders from when things went right.

This is just another version of the “Proof” folder. Create one. Keep one. Build one. Maybe include more than something someone has thanked you for or said positively about you. Maybe include what God has said about you, the lasting things, the things that are true not because of what you have done, but because of what God has done, and who God is.

Necessity is the Mother of Invention

But if there is a silver lining in this crisis, it may be that the virus is forcing us to use the internet as it was always meant to be used — to connect with one another, share information and resources, and come up with collective solutions to urgent problems. It’s the healthy, humane version of digital culture we usually see only in schmaltzy TV commercials, where everyone is constantly using a smartphone to visit far-flung grandparents and read bedtime stories to kids.

Already, social media seems to have improved, with more reliable information than might have been expected from a global pandemic. And while the ways we’re substituting for in-person interaction aren’t perfect — over the next few months in America, there may be no phrase uttered more than “Can someone mute?” — we are seeing an explosion of creativity as people try to use technology as a bridge across physical distances.

– Kevin Roose in The New York Times, “The Coronavirus is Showing Us How to Live Online”

Roose’s claim that “the virus is forcing us to use the internet as it was always meant to be used” assumes that the internet’s reason for being at its genesis was to foster connection, sharing, and problem solving. Then, the trolls moved in and divided us, unleashing chaos and infecting all of us, turning the web into an accelerant for hatred and strife. Now, a crisis is moving us back toward paradise. The internet has now been restored, and is being redeemed–for the moment.

Creation, fall, and restoration, precipitated by a crisis. There’s a mythic structure to this story.

But that misunderstands the nature of the internet, or of any broadcasting tool, which is more of an amplifier and signal booster. Tools like the web show us what was already there. During periods of crisis, we fixate on expressions of creativity and compassion. We look for light in the darkness. During periods of stability and comfort, we fixate on the problems and we increase in our despair. We notice the darkness rather than the light.

This shouldn’t be surprising to Christians that a crisis would precipitate a shift in the online mood. We claim, after all, that human beings are created in the image of God, and though fallen, God’s grace still is active even in those who may be alienated or cut off from fellowship. The clues we experience–our longing for connection, our desire to care, our compassion for those that are hurting–are resonances that point us to the divine, to God. When the normal means of pursuing those longings are removed, we seek other avenues to meet them.

We’re marveling at how this global pandemic is causing people to connect, care, and solve problems. But perhaps we should reflect as to why, apart from such a crisis, things get so nasty. The crisis draws our attention to the light. But in times of stability, perhaps we should be more focused on casting out darkness.

Satan’s Work

You see, I believe the Internet is the work of Satan.

– Kinky Friedman, Texas Hold’em: How I Was Born in a Manger, Died in the Saddle, and Came Back as a Horny Toad, 115

Kinky published these words, in this book, in 2005. He added, “If you require information on a certain subject, go to one of those places, I forget what you call them, with a lot of books inside and two lions out front. Pick a title, sit on the steps, and read between the lions.”

Sound backwards? Kinky knew you’d think so. “This may seem a little like a rather Neanderthal method of education, but at least you won’t be tempted to pretend to be someone you’re not and you won’t get carpal tunnel syndrome. In fact, the only things you’re liable to get are a little bit of knowledge and some pigeon droppings on your coat–which most people will tell you, and most computers won’t–means good luck.”

Twitter was founded on March 21, 2006.

Kinky also argued that “computers contribute to the homogenization of everyone’s brain. The technological revolution is not bringing us closer together–it’s merely making us more the same.”

That was prescient.

And I fully embrace the ironic fact that I’m relaying these thoughts via a computer, on the internet.

Cutting Cable

Television is changing, as are the ways people consume media.

We’ve heard for years younger generations are foregoing a cable subscription and opting instead to consume media in other ways. Hulu, Netflix, and Amazon Prime have changed how people watch shows, and with the advent of apps like Fox Sports Go, NBC Sports, and WatchESPN, there are more ways to stream live events on a phone, tablet, or other device. Our family has watched the last two Baylor women’s soccer matches on Facebook Live. My kids enjoy clicking the emojis.

This fall our family joined those who have cut the cord and chosen instead a combination of online streaming services. We followed a progression. Here’s how it unfolded.

First, We Canceled Cable

When we moved to Waco in 2016 we had choices to make with regard to our utilities. I wanted a local phone number (at the time, I wasn’t in a rush to have a cell phone), internet service, and to watch sports on television. I began shopping around, and asked a few friends for their recommendations. We ended up with a subscription bundle for a set rate and were locked in for the first year.

But the moment my subscription rate bumped one year later, I called to cancel the cable portion and bought an antenna. I could pick up ABC, CBS, NBC, and Fox.

We also had a Roku device, which meant that when our PBS signal wasn’t coming in strong I could stream shows for my kids via the PBS Kids Roku channel. I could save $80 a month ($960 a year), watch most of the major football, soccer, and baseball, and basketball games I wanted to catch, and I listened to internet radio for the rest. Despite the cable company’s offer to keep me at their current promotional rate on the day I called (which was the same as the first year fee), I cut the cord.

The Antenna Phase

I shopped around and finally bought a Leaf antenna. I placed it in the house in a spot that maximized reception and minimized its being an eyesore. I purchased some cable concealer from Home Depot, and kept my wires confined.

The antenna was complimented by the aforementioned Roku device. While I cancelled cable, I kept internet service at home. I’ve already mentioned the PBS Kids app. We could also stream movies or shows through Amazon Prime (which we’ve had for years due to the amount of shopping we do online).

We don’t regularly watch local or national news programs (I subscribe to the local paper). We usually have stuff going on during the weekends. And we do our best to read, play, or create stuff during our free time, with only sporadic consumption of movies or television. The antenna, plus the couple of apps we could use on our television with the Roku device, was plenty.

Subscribing to Streaming Services

Back in August when football season was approaching, I made a decision to explore the costs of the various streaming services. It was unclear how many Baylor home football games I would attend, and knew I wanted to watch them on the road. When the season began I thought they had a real shot at taking a step forward, winning six games, and becoming bowl eligible. It’s still possible.

I compared Sling, Hulu, and YouTube TV. All of these companies have strengths and weaknesses, and vary their packages in ways that are attractive to different consumers. For a little under $30 a month ($360 a year), I chose to go with one of Sling’s basic packages, one that I thought would land the highest number of Baylor football games during the season (I put my chips on the Fox family of networks).

I added an ESPN+ subscription as well. It’s advertised at $5 a month, but I paid $50 for the year (saving $10). So, in the end, my streaming television subscription package costs me a little under $35 a month.

What I’ve Learned

Do I get to watch every sporting event I want to watch? No. I chose not to buy one of the more advanced Sling packages, which would have given me access to the ESPN family of networks. I missed Chiefs/Rams on Monday Night Football (now argued to be the best regular season NFL game in history). But I watched a portion of the replay later in the week on the NFL Network (which is included in my Sling package), and had listened live to the radio broadcast.

Do I enjoy the ability to watch television on my TV and other devices? Absolutely. Sling is accessible on my tablet devices (and even my phone, if I wanted to stream there). I also love it that my Sling subscription works with select apps, including NBC Sports, Fox Sports Go, and others. They’re still working to expand the number of apps that will accept a Sling subscription (like AMC). I love that.

Do I enjoy being a better steward of our finances? Yes. By spending less on television I’m able to allocate funds to other things. And since my streaming subscriptions can be cancelled at any time, I’m contemplating what to do once football season concludes. I’m thinking about going back to antenna for a while and then reevaluating the streaming television market to decide if the enjoyment our family will receive is worth the cost.

A la carte television is a weird proposition for those of us who are used to paying for one big package where we get the channels we want and then a bunch of superfluous channels we never watch. I was hesitant at first. But what pushed me over the edge, eventually, was the cost. I spend less money to get most of what I want. Even if I would’ve bought a Sling bundle with more channels (including ESPN), I still would’ve spent less than cable.

(If you do research and are interesting in signing up for Sling, let me know and I’ll send you an invite code which may offer a price break for both of us.)

What’s Next?

The models will keep changing, as will the options, and I have a feeling that there will be some shifts ahead with how internet service providers offer their products. Time will tell.

If it gets too pricey, I still have my books and my local library, which is plenty to keep my occupied.